So! Season 2! Some big changes! Geordi is Chief Engineer, finally. Worf is Head of Security, finally. Riker's (in)famous beard is born, Crusher is replaced (temporarily) by Dr. Pulaski (boo), fucking Whoopie Golberg?, and Wesley has a new onesie!
Everything feels a bit tighter in the new season. Some nicer graphics and what not, I guess they were doing pretty good at this point and could afford to spend more on some shots. There is a scene of a shuttle taking off that doesn't look fuckin ridiculous, so that is something.
It is a shame that this episode is so dumb, being the first one of the new season. I guess they were still fucked from the writer's strike so they rehashed some old TOS script that never got used. This one is about intergalactic super whore Deanna Troi getting pregnant by some weird space seed. I guess it heard she was a freak bitch and decided to knock her up.
There is a hilarious scene where the whole bridge crew talks about how big of a slut she is and whether or not to abort her whore baby. But she totally freaks out and goes baby crazy.
Wallow in shame, harlot
Because of its space based magical properties, the energy-jizz-whatever thing turns into a kid in like 2 days. Troi goes from normal to knocked up to birthing awfully quickly. The birth scene is ridiculous, I guess her betazoidgina is so stretched out from whichever truck stop they were at getting dilithium that they little niglet just flys right out. Deanna doesn't feel anything.
"daaaaaaaaamn nigga u pregnant"
So, instead of being like "Oh I got space raped and now I have this weird freak baby" Deanna is more like "I'M A MOM NOW MEET MY SON IAN ISN'T THAT AWESOME? DON'T PAY ATTENTION TO THE FACT THAT MY FREAK BABY GREW 4 FEET IN 20 MINUTES AND CAN TALK AND SHIT. HE IS MY BAAAAAAAAABY!!! BAAAAAABBBBBBYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!"
Anyways blah blah freak baby is making some weird virus they are transporting on board go out of control so he turns back into a space-seed-light-thingy and floats off. Troi cries because her 2 day old weird not even really human son is gone, wtf, and then everything is back to normal. Oh man but then we have to hear for like 10 minutes some god damn Wesley shit. "wah wah wah I want to stay on the Enterprise. wah wah wah I don't want pear juice from galactus 9 whoopie goldberg!" Looks like we are stuck with crybaby asshole Wesley for a while.
tee-hee
Two awesome things about this episode to wrap things up. One, the guy transporting whatever plague thing is hilarious looking and two, fuck yea Colm Meaney. One of my favorite Trek actors (and characters really, O'Brien rules and I named a song after him) is finally transporter chief. If we have to have Whoopie (she must have really needed money), I'm glad we got Mr. Meaney too.
sup Donald
<3 U SO MUCH COLM <3
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